Graduation Speech

As a homeschooler, my speech is going to be different from every other grad speech you've heard. You're welcome.

To achieve an Alberta diploma, every grade 12 student must graduate with a minimum of 100 credits that they earn throughout high school.

Social 30, English 30, Math 20, CALM, PE 10 and your choice of a 20 level science are mandatory. You make up the remanding credits with optional courses such as foods, languages, apprenticeships, physical education and the other sciences and math you need to pursue your college or university career.

Every graduate has those achievements in common. Whether you glided through every -1 course with a 98% average, or scraped by with 51% in -2, you have achieved Alberta Education's stamp of approval as a young adult ready to face the world with a well rounded education.

That thought terrifies me.

Not because I feel completely unequipped to not only handle, but change the world... but because I don't believe that the work put toward my certificate, is what equipped me.

You see, I believe that Alberta Education has made a mistake in their curriculum.

They go on and on about head knowledge when, in reality, the answer to any math problem, social studies question or biology definition is just a few clicks away.

Can you imagine how the provincial average would skyrocket is we were allowed to take all of our everyday resources into the exam room?

Alberta Ed forgets that the world changers don't have to be the people who can answer the most math facts with the greatest accuracy and, off the top of their heads, they might not know where Iodine is on the periodic table.

The world changers though, I believe, could find Iodine on the periodic table. Because they've been taught to try hard and would look until they found it.

Funny how the ability to find the answer isn't enough for the diploma markers, isn't it?

Now, I'm sure I learned things in school that will be valuable to me in the future, and you're all here to celebrate my graduation, but I can't say that the diploma is my biggest achievement from the past three years.

Because it's not.

Like Alberta Ed, I believe in head knowledge. I believe in knowing things and being able to say things from memory off the top of your head.

But I don't believe that the formulas I had to memorize for my exam yesterday should be our measure of success.

In the words of my great grandma Vance, "There's always Google for that." (You have to admit - that's pretty cool coming from an 86 year old)

But where do I go when my world crashes and my faith is shaken or I need to make a split-second life-altering decision?

Surely math 30 won't come to mind, and surely Google will be of little help. 

Shouldn't that be what I need to know to be deemed "ready to take on the world"? 

If I was to tell you the one thing I learned in my entire high school career?

My best piece of wisdom that I gained and can pass on?

I am loved.

1 Corinthians says that Love never fails, but where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 

I am loved with by a Love that is greater than life itself.

And if this is the case - then what of the question that high schoolers are so often faced with, "So what do YOU want to do with your life?"

Here's the deal: I want to go to college. I want to gain practical skills that I can use to support myself.

But I wouldn't go so far as to say that nursing is "what I want to do with my life."

Because - I have found a Love GREATER than life.

And anything I could "do with my life" pales in comparison.

So, what will I do, now that I have a certificate that could grant me acceptance into colleges and universities and into the "real world"?

Maybe I will go to college.

Maybe I'll start a career.

Maybe I'll speak and people will listen.

Maybe I'll teach.

But without love?

I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.

So, yes. I'll do those things.

But what I'm planning on doing with my life is simple:

To be the salt and light Matthew 5 talks about and to be humble, patient, gentle and bearing with others in love.

And to anyone who's worried about me not being a homeschooler any more next year,

I just want to assure you – you can graduate the girl out of homeschool, but you can’t take the homeschooler out of the girl. 

Un-dumb

I shared this with my pastor the other week...
Maybe I'm brave enough to post it here now. haha
Also - I wasn't at YC this year... This is a session from last year. Yes, this post has been sitting waiting to be shared for a really long time. hahaha

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When I looked through the session schedule for YC and saw, "Leading un-dumbed down worship for un-dumb teens", I felt like it was a session for me. So I went.

I believe in people - all people. And I don't think I went to this session to justify myself as a teen wanting more. I went to see if there was anything to apply to the next group down. Grades K-4 ish kinda people.

I hate the concept of kids being the "church of tomorrow". Does not the kingdom of God belong to them? Are they not the church of TODAY?

When I was in grade 6, a pastor looked me in the eye and said, "Youth are not just the church of tomorrow. You're the church of today." I've never forgotten that.

So, if this is the case. And kids (even young teens) are the church of today... Shouldn't we treat them as such?

Can you imagine if your pastor got up next Sunday and said, "Today, instead of me preaching and the band playing... Lets watch a movie with a good moral that kinda-sorta lines up with one of the ten commandments!"

Really?
That would be ridiculous.
Yet, how often is Sunday school simply that?

A couple months ago, I taught a lesson for Sunday school. I followed the script I was given fairly closely, adding a few little comments here and there...

I talked for almost 25 minutes and the script barely mentioned Jesus.

I wanted to scrap the lesson and sit down and talk from my heart. I could have even used the same theme! I could have found many scripture verses and practical stories to tell. I could have, and I'm sure many of the other Sunday school volunteers could have, too. So... Why the story about the marshmallow factory?

Are we really dumbing it down so much that the Sunday school lesson is barely a scratch on the surface of a Bible story? Because I think that's a pretty big problem. They're not bad stories, of course. There's always a good moral behind it... But shouldn't church challenge depth?

I know kids want more. Deserve so much more. I know because eight years ago, I was the kid who hated Sunday school. Well, I hated Sunday school until I got to Miss Rita's class. Miss Rita taught straight from the Bible and I learned in her class.

But to the Sunday school volunteer who tried to bribe me into class with the promise that, "We're watching a movie today! Won't that be fun?" Don't you understand that the movie is the very reason I didn't want to attend?

I was hungry. Kids are hungry.

One quote from that YC session stands out to me is,  "short attention span isn't always because of immaturity. Sometimes its because we're lacking in giving them anything to focus on."

True, a six year old might not benefit a whole bunch from an hour long sermon including long passages read from the pastor's KJV...

But I'm pretty sure we could do better than marshmallow factories.

From the Rooftops

Sometimes I wonder what in the world I'm doing with my social media.

See, I write on here, and then I share on facebook and I keep a link in my instagram bio. So... That leaves it up to my friends to choose to actually *read* anything I say. I'm not forcing anyone.

"Hey, I wrote this! Read... Or not... Up to you..."
I'm not aggressive.

Awhile ago, someone challenged me on singing a song claiming to "shout from the rooftops".

And I thought hard about it...

Here's the thing... I'm sitting next to my open window. I could push the screen out and sit on the roof and yell my little heart out. There - from the rooftops. Does that earn me the right to sing that song?

I don't think it would really do anything. I don't think anyone would think anything other than of my insanity.

But if you don't take it quite so literally...

Facebook is a rooftop.

It might be the most visible rooftop in the world.

"So, I shout out Your name, from the rooftops I proclaim that I am Yours."

I am Yours.

And maybe my little voice from my little rooftop gets drowned out by all the bigger, better voices coming from all the taller, flashier rooftops out there.

I'm continually thankful, especially these past couple weeks, that He, my King, uses what the world sees as foolish to shame the wise.

And He'll use my little voice and my little rooftop, too - somehow. :)

Open Seas.

"I love the ocean. The water seems alive - its always moving... Going somewhere."

I always took the words, "when the oceans rage" to be negative. I've wrote about those words even. 

I always imagined being in a boat in the middle of the ocean when a storm stirs. 

It would be terrifying. You'd wonder if you would live, or if you would die in the water.

"I don't have to be afraid."

And then the other night, I listened to the worship team practice and a memory came to my mind.

I stood on a beach with my dad. We looked out over miles of sea, and he jokingly said that if I started swimming, my next stop would be Japan. Its not true, and he wasn't serious. But... There's not a ton of landmass between where we were and Japan. And I could - eventually - hit Japan. (Ha. Not swimming.)

How different the shores of British Columbia are from the shores of Japan. 

Different climate, different languages, different people...

I won't say which is nicer because I've never been to Japan - but I think they'd both be nice. 

So, imagine: 

You're in the middle of the ocean. And the wind blows and you're being carried somewhere. 

But then.

The tides and the winds change. And great, big, powerful waves are pulling you a different direction than you were going before. 

I don't have to be afraid... But I don't know where I'm going. 

It could be Japan and it could be British Columbia (not literally. At least - that I know of.) - and if I have a preference, I don't know what it is. I don't know where I'll end up... 

But no matter what direction I go - its new and unknown.

And when I realize that I'm not alone and that I don't have to be afraid... The raging seas and mystery of the winds and waters turn into an adventure rather than something to stress over.

I'm drawn to the song Shepherd my Amanda Cook. I feel like I could have written it.

"You will lift my head above the mighty waves,

You are able to keep me from stumbling,

and in my weakness, You are the strength that comes from within,

Good Shepherd of my soul, take my hand and lead me on..."

"You make my footsteps and my path secure so walking on water is just the beginning.

You are calling me to greater things."

Graduating is like being thrown into the middle of a raging sea - a raging sea that does not bring fear, only adventure and beautiful possibilities. Bring it on, world. I'm ready for you.

(39 days)

Questions for Jesus.

It's one of the classic Sunday School ice breaker questions.

"If you could ask God ONE THING and have it answered, what would it be?"

And we have a bunch of things we'd like answered.
From things like, "what makes the sky blue?" to,
"Why doesn't my voice sound like Kristine DiMarco's?" (Oh, I'm the only one?) to,
"Why did he have to die so young?"
"Why does she live her life in such constant pain?"
"Why did he hurt her (or me) like that?"
"Why didn't You speak to me when I felt lost?"

And they're all real questions that can only be answered by Him.
(Well, except the blue sky one. If you need some info, this website looked neat: http://www.sciencemadesimple.com/sky_blue.html)

I went to a hymn sing last week. Cute, right? I sat by myself and I think the next youngest person in the room was pastor Michael, but I was totally in my element. I was with my people. Just like my people are not divided by denomination, my people are also not divided by age.

Pastor Ken said this one thing that really stuck with me.

"People always say that when they get to Heaven they're going to have so many things to ask God. I don't want to pick any fights, but personally I don't think we'll have any questions on our minds when we get there. But we'll still be singing praises to Jesus."

Isn't that beautiful?

My heart longs for that - for all questions to be silenced.

Sometimes I have big questions. And sometimes they get answered. But sometimes they don't. And yeah, that's hard and confusing. But I'm learning to seek The Answer and not just "an answer."

What other answer would suffice?

Wave after Wave...

Its been a rough couple weeks. There's nothing big going on, so there's no reason for it to be especially rough.

You Make Me Brave by Amanda Cook has been on repeat, and the line that sticks out to me goes, 

"As Your love, wave after wave, crashes over me, crashes over me..."
And all I can do is pray for the next wave to hit.

See, ever since my personal revival (What you might know as "the summer/fall of 2012" haha) the deserts have been short and far in between... I've spent most of the past two years in some tropical rain forest where tsunamis are a regular occurrence and it rains nearly 24/7. His love, wave after wave of it... CRASHES over me.

I saw Noah the other week, and while it definitely wasn't very accurate, there were a few parts I liked.
I loved when Methuselah met the flood waters with open arms.

I've been waiting for the next wave to hit me with the force of flood waters.

My mentor described it as, "one of those times where God just seems to hide His face." I suppose its a faith builder, right? Since its impossible to please God without faith, I guess He can't be in our faces constantly.

Last Monday, I voiced some of my hearts desires and longings to one of my best friends. Things I wanted for my life and things I wanted to be able to do for others... Things I wanted to be, and things I wanted to accomplish...

And approximately 5 hours later, pastor Clay prophesied, prayed and spoke over me... Directly to some of the desires and longings I had voiced. But also... a direct echo of another prayer I received a year and a half ago. I want to say that I didn't need such an obvious confirmation... But I did. 

I emailed my mentor about is as soon as I got home and she said, 
"What a huge blessing and God affirmation....I love that He did this right during a time when you were having a harder time feeling Him. In light of what we talked about last discipleship....how tender and kind of our Father!! Sounds just like Him."


"It sounds just like Him." Doesn't it, though?

And His love, wave after wave... came crashing over me.

It was like God's voice was coming out of pastor Clay's mouth and He kept saying, "I see you. I know you. I love you."

"As Your love, in wave after wave, crashes over me, crashes over me...
You are for us, You are not against us.
Champion of Heaven, You made a way for all to enter in.
You make me brave.
You make me brave.
You call me out beyond the shore into the waves.
You make me brave.
You make me brave.
No fear can hinder now the promises You made." 

I think Amanda Cook is a kindred spirit. Her lyrics are always so... What I feel. 

Matthew chapter 5:14-16
14 “You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. 15 Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. 16 In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.

My People.

I'll admit, I've struggled with where exactly to put this term in the past. 

I attend a Baptist church on Sundays and a Pentecostal church on Mondays... And for awhile, I would have easily told you that my people were the people of MTC. But those crazy people at Tehillah have become to close to my heart to be left out when I answer the question of where my home is. 

My people are the people who meet in the little white church a mere 10 minute walk (2.5 minute drive - seriously) from my house. 

But my people are also the charismatic congregation I find myself a part of every Monday. 

"To our God we lift up one voice, to our God we lift up one song... Alleluia."

These are my people. 

My people are not a denomination.

My people are people who just want to be like Jesus. 

My people sing of Grace.
My people love and are loved. 
My people are passionate, whether they raise their hands in worship or not.

I know a lot of people have weird feelings about other denominations... but we're all going after the same thing, even if a little differently, aren't we?

I am drawn to the passage in Matthew 6 about serving two masters.

I feel that, if everything was wrong except one denomination...

How could I attend both and love both?

Either Tehillah would repel me and I'd love Mckenzie Towne Church... Or Tehillah would draw me away from MTC.
If one was wrong, wouldn't one of these two things happen?

1 Corinthians 1:12-13

"One of you says, “I follow Paul”; another, “I follow Apollos”; another, “I follow Cephas[b]”; still another, “I follow Christ.”

13 Is Christ divided? Was Paul crucified for you? Were you baptized in the name of Paul?"

Jesus is my denomination, Jesus is perfect theology, and His people... All of them... Are my people.

These are my people.