A driving lesson. From dads eyes.

So, I got my learners last month. Mom drove with me for a couple minutes a couple weeks ago, but we only worked on stopping and starting because we didn't have allot of time... Last night Dad took me out for my first real driving lesson... He said I did good for my first time, but he won't let go of the mistakes I did make... For instance, I forgot that you had to press the break to shift gears.

"She was grunting, and sweating... She had her foot up on the dash, pulling as hard as she could..."

Yeah, it took me about 10 seconds of pulling before I remembered... and I DID NOT have my foot up on the dash...

Or if I drifted a little bit to the left side of the rode: "OOH! You just got in a head on collision and killed us both!"

SOUND OFF

Lately, we've been doing 'sound off' on the way to swimming... You know, as a joke... Its not like we would ever actually accidentally leave one of the kids behind... You know that, right?

So, we get in the car for swimming:

Mom: SOUND OFF!

Cairo: ONE!

Sloan: TWO

Peyton:_______________

Cairo and Sloan: PEYTON!

Peyton: OH! three.

Charter: HAAHA!

Sloan: Whats so funny?

Charter: The MOVIE!

Sloan: You're supposed to say four.

Charter: FOUR!

Mollen: fi--

Gage: SIIIX!

Mollen:--ve

Sloan: Gagey, say it again!

Gagey: SIX!

Cairo: (Jokingly) Ephraim! Say seven!

Ephraim: (Screech) DEVE! (With short Es)

Everyone: WHAT??!?! Didn't that sound like Ephraim just said seven?! Lets try it again to see if he'll do it twice in a row!

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SOUND OFF

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Cairo: ONE!

Sloan: TWO

Peyton: OH! THREE!

Charter: _____ OH! FOUR!

Mollen: FI--

Gagey: SIX!

Mollen:--VE

Sloan: Gagey, say it again!

Gagey: SIX!

Ephraim:____________

Charter: Ok, that didn't count... one more time...

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Sound off

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Cairo: One.

Sloan: TWO

Peyton: OH! Three

Charter: FOUR

Mollen: FI-

Gagey: SIX!

Mollen: -Ve

Sloan: Gagey, say it again...

Gagey: SIX!

Ephraim: (Quite pleased with his first reaction) DEVE!

By now everyone is tired of sound off, and we're already halfway to Okotoks. I've had enough with the yelling, so I decide to do it by myself 'cause I really want Ephraim to do it just one more time..

Cairo: Hey, yum! 1 2 3 4 5 6...

Ephraim extends his neck and tries to bite my finger... Maybe he's sick of sound off too...

I fight you

Gagey's new 'thing' is wrestling... I guess every little boy goes through that at one point or another, right?

For those of you who have never been to my house, we have a small landing about 3ft by 3ft two steps away from the top of the stairs. Gagey likes to go to the top of the stairs and jump down onto the landing.
On this particular day, me, mom and sloan were all sitting on the landing cheering as Ephraim exercised his new crawling up the stairs skills, when Gagey appears at the top. "I fight YOU!"
Sloan and mom retreat from the landing and I realize that I must fight this battle myself. "Bring it ON!"

Gagey jumps from the landing, and I can honestly say, he might be better than Charter... I'm trying pretty hard and I can't pin this kid. Finally, Gage realizes that I might be a little too tough for him, so he motions Sloan. "Noan, you fight now."
Of course, everyone thinks he means that him and Sloan will showdown now, right? NO! Sloan enters the "ring" and just as quickly, Gagey exits, leaving me and Sloan on the landing together.
"I watch YOU now. aaaand, FIGHT!"

Oh, its on....

Let's start today off with a little history lesson:

Ok, class. Today we are going to learn about our tougher ancestors, people you might know them as the "Teutons", or perhaps the old goths of northern Italy.
The Teutons were the people who lived just outside the border of the roman empire. The were very tough... They were, infact the people who over threw the roman empire.

Ok, now that we have completed that little lesson, lets get on with my story...

We were doing history today, and, as you probably already guessed, we were learning about the teutons. Charter seemed fastinated, until mom read, "The teutons are the ancestors of most of us!"

Charter: NO! I don't want to be a TEUTON!

Mom continued reading... "They had blonde hair and blue eyes. If you have blonde or light brown hair, you might be a decendent of the teutons. If you have black hair, you are probably not."

Charter looked up at his own mop of white hair. "OOH MAN! I AM a TEUTON! STINK!"

**Now, at this point, I should interupt the story to say that Charters middle name is Smith after our great grandpa. **

Mom: The teuton women would tend the animals because the teuton men spent all their time hunting, fighting and blacksmithing. Blacksmithing was a very important job because that is how the teutons made all of their weapons. That is why "smith" was such an honored and popular name among the teutons."

Every eye turns to Charter. We burst out laughing, "CHARTER! You totally ARE a teuton!! YOUR middle name is SMITH!"

Charter: Yeah... Everything mom reads is exactly me! How I look, my name...

There was even a picture of a teuton warrior that showed some resemblence. Now, since me and charter are brother and sister, does that mean I am a teuton too? I hope not...

Last night as I was lying in bed, I thought of a very serious predicament.
See, Thursdays are very busy for us. I have BVF at 6:30pm for one hour. Charter (And normally Peyton, when she doesn't have a broken arm) has karate at 7pm for one hour. If my dad is home, then my mom will take either me or Charter and my dad will take the other one while Sloan babysits the other kids. If my Dad is not home, then Charter gets a ride with a friend that is also in karate. If my mom has worship team practice, then dad drives me and charter gets a ride with a friend.
So, this Thursday is especially crazy... Dad is getting home in the late afternoon. (Thankfully because Charters friend that would be able to drive him is out of town!) Dad will take me and mom will take Charter. Simple.
Sloan has to babysit from 6:30-10:30pm for our neighbour, so mom and dad will have to divide the kids to drive places.
This is where I think of the predicament. What is one extra thing that could happen? MOM'S WORSHIP TEAM PRACTICE! Yup. And not only does mom have to go... This Sunday is a special day because all of the kids are going to the adult service, so the kids worship team also has to be at the practice. (Which by the way is from 7-8:30.pm) Guess who's on the kids worship team? Me. Sloan. Peyton. Charter. Yup. That makes things difficult.

Today the facilitator is coming... She's going to be here any minute... Dad told the kids before he went to work that if they are hyper while the facilitator is here, then mom will give them a "ticky" and he will 'deal with them' when he gets home... He also told Charter that if he gets 10 tickies today, he won't see his 1oth birthday... I know, charter is only 8... He will see his 9th birthday in the ICU at the hospital, and then he won't see his 10th at all... Charter goes, "Well, that will be fun!" He knows my dad toooo well...
*bing bong*
Oh! The facilitator is here! Gotta go jump up and down excitedly and show her my stuff!
See ya later!

So, me, mom Sloan and Gagey are watching T.V. in moms room.

Me: Hey, mom...
Gage: RORO! SHUSH! I AM TRYING TO (s)LEEP!
Me: Sorry...
Gagey: (Throws himself on a pillow and closes his eyes... 10 seconds later, peeks out of one eye)
I not go leep... I play MONDERS! (Monsters) RAAAAAAAAWWR!

Me: Gagey, SHUSH! I'm trying to sleep!
Gagey: NO! You not Leeeping! You the bad guy and I get you! AAAARRG!

So much for going to sleep...